Richard Shadick's profile on the Gottman Referral Network

Dr. Richard Shadick

Licensed Psychologist

(212) 477-3360

Do you have a difficulty with a relationship? Lost a loved one in unexpected or traumatic circumstances or perhaps to suicide? These are some areas of my expertise but I have broad experience in many areas. Please read on to learn more about the work I do. Feel free to email me if you have any questions or visit the links to the left to learn about my clinical and research work.

I work with couples,  adults, and families. I have particular expertise in those who experience relational conflict, survivors of trauma, and those who have lost loved ones to suicide. I also work extensively with college students with such issues as academic performance, identity, and substance use. I am trained at level two of the Gottman method and am certified with American Association of Suicidology as a suicide prevention specialist. 

With my clients I create a safe and supportive environment and find that clients are better able to openly explore their feelings in that way. I strive to understand the concerns my clients come to me with and to empower them to effect change in their lives.

I practice individual therapy primarily from a psychodynamic perspective, which means that I believe one's previous relationships and experiences have an influence on one's present problems. By exploring both the past and the present, clients are better able to develop relationships and make changes in their lives. With couples I use a Gottman approach and I also draw from Imago therapy as well. I also work from a cognitive-behavioral approach when there are specific problems that need to be worked on in a brief period of time.

What can you expect in a first meeting? You will get an opportunity to talk about the concerns you are experiencing as well as the history of your problem. We will also talk about your broader life so that I may understand who you are as a person. At the end of the meeting you will be able to ask questions and hear my ideas about how to develop solutions for your concerns.

 

Office Location:

currently practicing remotely

 

2016 Is Testing Us. Here’s How to Get An A.

December 29, 2016  /  Richard Shadick

For most, this has been a challenging year. The past 12 months have been in our face, a barrage of tweets, blogs, sensational headlines, and viral videos.  Violence seems everywhere: racial profiling, terrorist attacks, the murder of policemen, peaceful protests met with aggression, and hate crimes on the rise. Vitriolic partisan stalemates and election stress have only made things worse. And if that isn’t enough, this year has had 15 large-scale disasters and another record-breaking global temperature high. All of this can leave us feeling stressed, traumatized, anxious, or depressed.

As the year winds down, it is very tempting to see 2016 as unusual, as a bad year. It is appealing to try and forget it, put it behind us, and move on. My advice is, don’t.

These events are unfortunately not an aberration; it is likely that more of these events and issues will come. So rather than stick our head in the sand, it is far more effective—and healthy—to be curious about the issues, learn about what disturbs you about them, and then act accordingly. How? Take these three steps.

First, don’t let hate beget more hate. We become the very thing we do not like and want in our world if we respond to these events with bitterness, anger, or retaliation. Let your feelings of hurt, anxiety, or anger transform into energy for positive change. If confronted with negativity, respond with positivity or in the words of our First Lady, “When they go low, we go high.”

Second, don’t just do something; sit there. So much is said by so many and yet no one is being heard. It is this absence of meaningful dialogue that contributes to many of the problems we face today. So, don’t just do something, sit there—listen and learn about the issue. Once someone feels heard, it is more likely that they will listen, too.

Third, don’t give up; the secret to overcoming is persistence. If you don’t like a situation, work to make it better. Change can take time so be patient. Start by choosing a cause you believe in and mobilize: Sign a petition, join a protest or town meeting, volunteer, engage in a dialogue, or donate to a cause. Connect with others to gain momentum and make it social. The act of doing something can lead to feeling better.

While this may sound like a primer for political action, it is not. Striking the right tone, listening, and persistent action are the keys to good communication and mental health. Decades of research in clinical science has shown that this approach is the key to overcoming stress, trauma, and suffering. It is the way to move forward and grow healthier. It is what we in the mental health world call post-traumatic growth. Stuffing feelings lead to body symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, and lower back pain. Working through your feelings leads to a more positive, healthy life.

So before you wave goodbye to 2016, take the right attitude, listen, and empower yourself to act—and have a happy and healthy new year.

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